So, I think it’s safe to say that I have sufficiently settled into summer’s groove. This is week five of freedom, that is the fifth week I’ve gone without riding beside my mother to get to school by 8:30 each morning. Each summer I find myself facing the same questions that arose the summer before. The first, am I using my time wisely? That’s a big one. You are granted only two months of summer. The rest of your time is dedicated to expanding your mind and skills in the conventional sense a.k.a. attending school. Summer is the time to do things your way. The second question, am I satisfied with my life at school? During the commotion of the year when responsibilities and deadlines seem to wax more routinely than they wane, it’s simple to find your focus fully occupied by surviving the next thing. You get things done, but sometimes in the midst of all the demands it’s easy to miss the big picture. The summer serves as an evaluation period for all that went under the radar during the year, that sometimes being your habits, your friendships, your choices. You sort of factory reset for the next year, but you’ve got to decide first what it is you are wanting to preserve versus what needs to be let go. And the third and final question, at least for me, is what am I going to do next? With what awaits on the horizon, these questions carry a greater weight than they have before. And the answers seem that much more important.
Ideally, before I board the plane for France in September I’ll have gotten the chance to meet up with each of my friends at least once. I’d have had the opportunity to finish my book and teach myself code (html, python, etc). I’d have become a master at robotics and refined my French to the point where I can converse with ease. I’ll have spent ample time with my family and also saved enough through my job as a robotics counselor to avoid putting any strain on my family while I’m away. But all of this takes some time, and I find myself having to make choices. What am I willing to sacrifice? What really is important to me? The same logic carries over to questions two and three. Am I satisfied with my life at school? I’m about to leave it behind for a period of time. What do I need to make a concerted effort to hold on to? As I’m branching out and creating these new relationships and garnering these new experiences next year, how much of my time can I set aside for routine conversations with people back home and for revising stories I have written in English. If this takes away from immersion over there, how much can I prioritize before it becomes a matter of cheating myself out of the unique opportunity presented to me? And finally, there is the question of what to do next. I don’t think there’s any definitive answer. As hard as I try to deconstruct this question and read between the lines to see if God or fate is dropping any hints, it seems I always end up stumbling around and letting things unfold for themselves. Whether or not this is positive, I cannot say. Going away means I have a clean slate. But I want to make sure that I am living in such a way that when I have reached the halfway point of summer 2016, I can say I made the right choices. Only time will tell. This entry has been more of a stream of consciousness post, so thanks for bearing with me.
Wanna hear today's entry in French?? Click below.
Ideally, before I board the plane for France in September I’ll have gotten the chance to meet up with each of my friends at least once. I’d have had the opportunity to finish my book and teach myself code (html, python, etc). I’d have become a master at robotics and refined my French to the point where I can converse with ease. I’ll have spent ample time with my family and also saved enough through my job as a robotics counselor to avoid putting any strain on my family while I’m away. But all of this takes some time, and I find myself having to make choices. What am I willing to sacrifice? What really is important to me? The same logic carries over to questions two and three. Am I satisfied with my life at school? I’m about to leave it behind for a period of time. What do I need to make a concerted effort to hold on to? As I’m branching out and creating these new relationships and garnering these new experiences next year, how much of my time can I set aside for routine conversations with people back home and for revising stories I have written in English. If this takes away from immersion over there, how much can I prioritize before it becomes a matter of cheating myself out of the unique opportunity presented to me? And finally, there is the question of what to do next. I don’t think there’s any definitive answer. As hard as I try to deconstruct this question and read between the lines to see if God or fate is dropping any hints, it seems I always end up stumbling around and letting things unfold for themselves. Whether or not this is positive, I cannot say. Going away means I have a clean slate. But I want to make sure that I am living in such a way that when I have reached the halfway point of summer 2016, I can say I made the right choices. Only time will tell. This entry has been more of a stream of consciousness post, so thanks for bearing with me.
Wanna hear today's entry in French?? Click below.